Well, it's that time of year again. I know you and the elves are busy getting everything ready for next Friday night. Hope the reindeer are well and well-fed and ready for the big trip across the world. Santa, I'm blessed. I have a great family, my kids and grandkids are all healthy. My health is good and I love my job. So, I'm not asking for anything this year, but there are some things that friends of mine could use. So, here is my Christmas list. I think most, if not all of these folks avoided your naughty list this year, but even if they didn't, I'm asking for the following for them just the same.
Please bring to.....
UL President, Dr. Joe Savoie==A Bobby Jindal voodoo doll, complete with a great big pack of sharp pins.
UL Athletics Director David Walker--A hole-in-one on the golf course, a comfortable chair for the back porch and an ice chest full of Coors Light.
UL Sr. Associate Athletics Director Scott Farmer--David Walker's office...permanently.
Coach Rickey Bustle--An opportunity to do whatever he wants to do, whether it's in coaching or out, in Lafayette or not.
Coach Robert Lee--Another opportunity, eventually.
Coach Tony Robichaux--A spring signing period with the quality of the fall, so we can soon have another trip to Oz.
Coaches Stefni and Mike--A healthy Ashley Brignac and a quality replacement for Donna B.
Coach Bob Marlin--The patience to make it through a trying season and quality players who fit his system.
Coach Mark Hudspeth--364 days as good as day one was.
Coach Errol Rogers--The second coming of Yolanda Jones. Or Anna Petrakova.
UL Sports Information Director Darryl Cetnar--A third full time staff member and lots of toys for new baby Alexander.
UL Assistant SID Matt Hebert--A girlfriend and an apartment, not necessarily in that order.
UL Grad Assistant Cade Sirmans--That third full time positon that I've asked for Daryl.
The UL Athletics Department--A million dollar increase in the RCAF.
The Daily Advertiser's Josh Parrott--A travel budget.
Cajun T (cajunredzone.com)--Enough money to where his hobby can become his work.
Charlie Daigle (Cajun Charlie)-- A 50 yard line seat at the 2011 New Orleans Bowl, watching his favorite team
Steve Peloquin--A new pair of running shoes.
Scott Prather--One that looks like nephew Oliver.
Billy Ryckman--A lump of coal (he roots for the Falcons and Tech.)
Mr. Bitter--Xanax.....lots of xanax
Bandit--Santa, you can skip his house. He won't mind. His present arrived on November 6th
Kevin Foote--Happy pills
Big Dave--Restoration of health and a gift certificate to Poche's
High School Administrators--A realization that the press box should be reserved for the press and workers only. And, that parents should not be allowed to serve as workers under any circumstances.
LSU Coach Les Miles--A new job where you make a lot of money and fans actually appreciate what you do.
LSU fans--Curly Dinardo as your new head coach after Miles leaves. There's nothing wrong with a little humility.
Saints fans--Another one...just like the other one.
The faithful on raginpagin---Teams that win and the ability to quit complaining once they do.
The trolls on raginpagin---A clue. Any clue.
Turbine (ragin'pagin webmaster)--the willingness to hit the delete button when warranted (see trolls, above)
And, for my friends around the Sun Belt Conference:
Arkansas State--Wisdom when hiring compliance officers. UL got that gift a few years back. It sure makes life easier
Arkansas LIttle Rock--A home that fits the profile of who you are
Denver--Enough teams in the WAC to have a league.
FAU--Some fans to put in that new stadium.
FIU--The ability to generate revenue to you don't have to built athletics on the backs of your student population.
Middle Tennessee drop-the-state=--An easier fight in the name battle than what we've had
South Alabama--One helluva going away party for Steve Kittrell. Please make sure I'm invited.
North Texas--A freaking baseball team. Please don't call yourselves viable until you get one.
Troy--An increase in admission standards--geez.
Western Kentucky--The realization on the part of the administration that it isn't always all about you. Especially when your football team goes 2-10.
And to my broadcasting friends around the league:
Barry McKnight--Troy--Isn't it about time you bring him the Broadcaster of the Year award? Even if he still can't say "Lafayette".
Mitch Hyder--Denver---A poster of Orien Greene as he waits for that chance to call an NCAA tournament game.
Mike Waggenheim--Nicholls State (formerly UNO)--a return to the Belt.
Chip Walters--MT--A dry pair in every locker room.
Hank Dickenson--UNT--The book "How to do baseball play-by-play." Who knows, he might need it one day.
Randy Lee-WKU--A graceful flowing way to say W-K-U
Lee Shirvanian--USA--A new picture to replace the 1980's shot in the USA media guides.
Dave LaMont--FAU--Half of Mr. Bitters Xanax scrip.
Matt Stolz-ASU--Unbreakable glass in the baseball press box.
I know it's a pretty long list, Santa, but I hope you can get this done on such short notice. Thank you in advance and Merry Christmas to you and Mrs. Claus.