Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
The Funniest ‘First World Dog Problems’ Memes
Dog and jokes! Dogs and jokes! Good memes happen when you combine dogs and jokes! With that in mind, we proudly bring you the best of the First World Dog Problems meme. These poor dogs -- they think they have it so rough (ruff? Ugh. sorry).
The Future Is Now — Star Trek Phasers Are Real
You know how sometimes you're walking through Times Square, and it reminds you a little too much of 'Blade Runner,' then you get an email on your hand-sized computer/phone, and you have a massive panic attack because THE FUTURE IS NOW?!!!!! This video does not help that feeling. At all.
‘Sad Cat Diary’ Offers Hilarious Insight Into the Feline Mind
Internet superstar Ze Frank has made a video documenting the diary entries of sad cats. If cats could write a diary, and their brains followed the same brand of logic that human brains do, we imagine this is exactly what a sad cat's diary would be like.
20 Awesomely Creative Business Cards You Won’t Throw Out
We know -- business cards? Even though nearly everything is done in the digital realm, they are still a thing. A thing we usually throw in the bin straightaway. We would gladly let these cards clutter up our desk, though. They're creative enough to warrant existing, and probably actually earn their proprietors some business. Check them out below.
Steak ‘N Shake Server Gets a Whopping 7,000% Tip
CeCe Bruce had been working at a Steak n' Shake in Indiana for two years when she received the tip of a lifetime. After watching Bruce deal with some rude customers, a regular tipped $446 on her $5.96 check -- that's a 7,000 percent tip.
Tasty Cicada Recipes for When the Swarm Strikes This Summer
Listen, don't read this while you're eating. Come back when you've finished though. It's just that reading about parboiling insects might have a negative effect on your appetite. See, the 17-year cicadas have already started to emerge from the ground, and there are going to be billions of them. BILLIONS. So, you may as well eat some, right?
17 Ridiculously Cute Moths (Yes, Moths)
Generally speaking, we think of moths as the unsettling, night-flying creepster cousin of the butterfly. But *look* at this Emperor Gum Moth! It is at least as cute as a candid shot of a dog. At least. So we scrounged up some more pictures of moths cute enough that we probably wouldn't scream if they made their way into our apartment and started flying into the overhead light...
14 Adorable Beetles That Won’t Make You Scream in Terror
Generally, when we think of beetles we imagine something black and vaguely menacing, slowly crawling towards our foot. GAH! It turns out, not all beetles are that way.
‘Textastrophe’ Pranks People Who Publicly Display Their Phone Number
Have you ever seen somebody share their phone number publicly (on Craigslist maybe, or one of those homemade ads for "computer lessons" on the subway) and thought to yourself "I should totally prank this guy"? You haven't? Oh, uh ... neither have we. Ever. Clearly -- we're not monsters. But the person behind Textastrophe is!
How to Annoy Every New Yorker in Under a Minute
Thanks, Buzzfeed! Not only can you name all the ways Todd Akin is just like Zach Morris, or whatever, you also managed to take all of the most annoying things about living in NYC and stick them in one video! We are now irrationally angry.
14 Animals Dropping Winks
These animals know what's up. They know your secret. They know you're in on the joke. They know how to close their eyes one at a time. They know how to be adorable. They know how to wink.
21 Examples of Starbucks Employees Completely Massacring Someone’s Name
If there's one thing we love about Starbucks, it's that they always give us a place to go to the bathroom. Aside from that, it's also always a good time when they mix up a customer's name. When a Hong Kong Starbucks employee thought a woman named Virginia was actually named Vagina, we laughed.
We figured why not keep the laughs coming and found some more Starbucks name fails. We also included what
Awesome Karaoke Couple Rescues Dumb ‘Leno’ Bit
You know the drill -- Jay Leno pulls some sort of "prank" on random people, and then we all are supposed to laugh at how dumb they are. Yaaaawn. Fortunately this time Leno's plan went awry, when the person he was attempting to startle turned out to be a talented, extroverted singer, who knows all the words to Bon Jovi's "Living on a Prayer."
Man Proposes to Girlfriend With Adorable Puppet Movie
If you've had a loooong week, watch this video. Unless of course your week has been long because you got dumped, or you made a homemade puppet movie trailer and used it to propose to your girlfriend as a surprise and she said no, in which case RUN AWAY!
World Snooker Championships Interrupted by Massive Farts
If you're not familiar with snooker, congratulations on not being a 60-year-old British man! Also, it's kind of like billiards, and so spectators are expected to maintain silence when watching a game. No talking, laughing, and no farting. Come on, guys...
16 Reasons Why Moms Are Awesome
Why are moms awesome? Here are (just a few) reasons why moms are awesome.
The Best Confession Kid Memes
Thank you, Reddit. For all the creepy creepster stuff you do, you sometimes come up with something like this and make us laugh and laugh. The Confession Kid meme is a much more charming cousin of the now-classic Confession Bear. We think he's about a million times better though.
Man Has More Fun on Treadmill Than You Ever Dreamed Possible
Wow. We've never had this much fun on a treadmill. Granted, we've never actually been on a treadmill because we've got really bad knees and asthma, but still ... this looks like a lot more fun than the elliptical machine too.
Couple Breaks Up in Epic Kiss Cam Dispute
Real or not real, this is officially the best part of going to a Grizzlies game -- watching people break up on the Kiss Cam. Unless, of course, you're the guy who got dumped, in which case this is probably the worst part of going to a Grizzlies game.
The Best Dove Beauty Sketches Parodies
Surely you've seen this ad from Dove, in which a forensic sketch artist draws women as they describe themselves, then as other women describe them, then everybody starts crying? If not, it's here for the watching, just to give you some context before we settle in to what this is really all about -- making fun of that ad.