Aubrey Sitterson

On this week’s ‘Monday Night Raw’ Brock Lesnar picked up the microphone for the first time since his return to WWE the week prior. But before we had much time at all to tweet mean jokes about the timbre of Lesnar’s not-so-threatening voice, he was interrupted by a fired-up John Cena. What followed was a confrontation that saw Lesnar make an absolutely humongous impact…by socking John Cena right in the mush.

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It’s late March and people who generally leave the room when you talk about wrestling are starting to ask questions like, “The Undertaker is still wrestling!?” which can mean only one thing: ‘WrestleMania’ season is upon us.

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This is it, folks. While WWE very cagily tried to market both its World Title matches and the annual Undertaker Streak vs. Whatever match as main events, we all knew a year ago what ‘WrestleMania XXVIII’s’ real selling point would be: The Rock vs

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While watching it live last year, Undertaker and Triple H’s ‘WrestleMania XXVII’ match didn’t really do it for me. At the time it just felt like a mess of finishes and unearned big moments, and truthfully, I was still a little chaffed at the hubris of Triple H trying to outdo Shawn Michaels’ legendary Mania matches against Undertaker

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While the Rock vs. John Cena is clearly the true main event of ‘WrestleMania XXVIII,’ in certain circles the most talked about contest will without a be CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho. The two have a lot in common: Neither boast the humongous physique typically favored by WWE, both honed their abilities for years before arriving at the big show, both are perennial favorites of so-called “smart marks” and both typically do their best work as heels, which prevents them from rising to the level of WWE’s largest stars

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What the hell is this match about? Yeah, Kane is evil and does evil stuff, and Orton’s nominally a good guy, but why are these two men fighting one another? The world’s evilest Libertarian, Kane, gave a wacky, roundabout explanation on ‘SmackDown’ a couple weeks ago, but it didn’t clarify much of anything, meaning that this match is still pretty much just about a guy we boo fighting a guy we cheer

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Back in the days of the Legacy – Randy Orton’s “sons of famous guys” stable – Cody Rhodes always kind of felt like an afterthought. Orton was the focus obviously, DiBiase was the big, hunky future star, and Rhodes was the smaller guy with a lisp who hung out with them

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Without question, the absolute least interesting storyline to appear on WWE television these last few months has been the ongoing feud between John Laurinaitis, General Manager of ‘Raw,’ and Theodore Long, General Manager of ‘SmackDown

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This year, ‘Extra’ host Maria Menounos will be appearing at ‘WrestleMania’ to most likely make Beth Phoenix and/or Eve Torres look terrible by showing that either one of them can be beaten on wrestling’s grandest stage by a person who spends most of the year talking about celebrity gossip

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Truth be told, of the four (!!!) main events at ‘WrestleMania XXVIII,” the World Heavyweight Championship Match between Daniel Bryan and Sheamus holds the least interest to me. Don’t get me wrong, Bryan’s slow and steady heel turn has been one of the most entertaining and fascinating ones in ages – I wrote a whole article compa